改写现在有的人作文
篇一:《有的人》改写
《有的人》改写
有的人,一生做生做死只为了得到一刻的幸福
因为他知道:生存是为了更好地活着;
有的人,觉得人生无趣,就一了百了离开人世
因为他知道:人生如果失去了意义就比忘记了呼吸还痛苦;
有的人,一生只知道贪生怕死,到头来还不是一无所获
因为人生的价值,应该看他贡献什么,而不是取得什么;
有的人一生努力奋斗着,到头来拥有了一番成就
因为一个人必须经过一番刻苦奋斗,才会有所成就。
??
其实人生没什么,着名文学家司马迁曾说过:“人固有一死,或重于泰山,或轻于鸿毛。”南宋文学家说过:“人生自古谁无死,留取丹心照汗青。”人生的过程是靠你自己去造化,并不是可以侥幸,因为人生在你的面前只是一个考验。
隆江示范小学六年级:杨可欣
篇二:改写的作文
As the old says goes,“Where there is a will, there is a way.”
Nowadays, there is a growing concern over the phenomenon that some parents take care of almost everything concerned about their children, including study, work and marriage. Some parents believe that this is love, however, it is only to destroy children’s independence thoroughly.
Attend Your Classes Regularly(最好的问题解决型)
1、现在大学校园里,迟到、早退、旷课是常见的现象
2、保证学生的出勤率对大学教育的重要性
3、作为一个大学生应该怎样做
Class attendance has become a prominent issue facing many university students.(第二句指出问题的所在) some university students are late for or even absent from classes.
Obviously,This behavior which will give rise to Some Adverse effects on the future development
In fact, it is very important for the students to attend their classes regularly. First, it will ensure you to catch up with the teachers in your learning. That is very helpful to you if you want to do a good job in your study. Second, attending classes regularly is a way of showing respect to your teachers ,too. Your teachers will feel bad if the students do not attend their classes, which, in turn, will affect their teaching and be no good for the students. Third, attending classes will help to form a good habit of punctuality, which is of great importance for the students to do a good job in the future.
Therefore, we university students should form the good habit of attending our classes regularly from now on. And some day we’ll benefit from it.
College Students’ Job Hunting(最好的现象解释型)
1、近几年出现了大学生就业难的现象
2、产生这种现象的原因(如大学生追求的目标过高,专业不对口等) 3、如何解决这一问题(改变就业观念,大学生再培训等)
Employment has become a prominent issue facing many university students, These problems which have already posed a severe threat to our health,some Even have got accustomed to it.some Even have already a very deep feelings so what underlies the salient phenomenon?(参照考研作文书上的前两句,再加上这一句构成了第一段)
There is no doubt that many factors contribute to the Employment. To start with, today’s employers put too much emphasis on employees’ degrees. Under such situation. those with lower education background are less likely to get an ideal job. What is more, false values in our society also account for fake diploma.. People are inclined to think tha they want are “good” jobs which could offer good salary, comfortable working conditions, high social status among others. on the other hand, some students major on campus don not fit in with the demands of jobs. So companies can not take some students into account.
If we let this situation go as it is, We would face even more
severe consequences
文凭造假
There is no doubt that many factors contribute to the phenomenon. To start with, today’s employers put too much emphasis on employees’ degrees. Under such situation. those with lower education background are less likely to get an ideal job. What is more, false values in our society also account for fake diploma. People are inclined to think that the more education he gets, the more respect he will receive. On the contrary, people with poor educational background will be looked down upon, no matter how successful they are.
(最好的利弊型)与现象解释不同的在于最后一
句不同,利弊型最重要的是最后一段,也就是我的态度段
1. 目前因特网的作用越来越大 2. 人们对因特网的利弊看法不一
3. 你的看法 the Internet has become a prominent issue facing many university students,some even have got accustomed to it.some even have already a very deep feelings.while making our life easier,it may bring us pontential problem as well
the Internet information searching is no longer a tough job with the help of all kinds of search engines. Secondly, we can contact friends or business partners via e-mails or software such as Internet Meeting and Yahoo lists to talk with friends of the same interest. And let them have many ways to find information as well as broaden our horizons.
the Internet costs considerable time, money and energy especially for those with less self-control. In the second place, surfing on the Internet for a long time harms the eyes a lot. Finally, most young people are indulged in online games, Internet chat 聊天 , which are harmful to their future development.
我的态度段,我的建议段(然后说明我赞成的理由) The past few years witnessed the fast development of the Internet along with national economy. As we know,No one is perfect, no gold is pure gold . as long as we make good use of it the Internet can do us nothing but good A brighter future is awaiting us on the condition that we make good use of the Internet.(就是中间一句话不会写)
Through the above analysis, I believe that the positive aspects overweigh the negative ones. Therefore, I would like to say network is not that horrible, as long as we know more about it and it will become our right hand on our studies if we make good use of it in a correct way.((((个人观点个人观点个人观点个人观点
经典写作句子
we should pay attention to而用Attention should be paid to.
individuals in Growing numbers替换 more and more people
on the condition that 替换 if
1.There is a growing trend these days for many people who live in rural areas to come into and work in city. Which has caused wide public concern in most cities all over the world.
农民进城打工正成为增长的趋势,这一问题在世界上大部分城市已引起普遍关注。 .The dawn of the new century witnessed the increasing popularity of computers. Coincident with the advancement of science and
technology, computers pouring into the current society as a fashion are appealing to growing individuals. 新世纪的曙光目睹了电脑的日益普及。科学技术的进步与重合,涌入当前社会作为一种时尚的计算机是吸引越来越多的个人。 2
3.Although many experts from universities and institutes consistently maintain that it is an inevitable part of an independent life, parents in growing numbers are starting to realize that people, including teachers and experts in education, should pay considerable attention to this problem.
尽管来自高校和研究院的许多专家坚持认为这是独立生活不可避免的一部分,然而越来越多的家长开始意识到包括教师和教育专家在内的人们应该认真对待这一问题。
4.No one can doubt the essential fact that the traffic problem over the last years has caused wide public concern all over the world. Experts in increasing numbers are beginning to believe that such situation would produce unfavorable effects on economic growth of local areas.
没有人能否认这一重要事实:最近几年交通问题在全世界受到了普遍关注。越来越多的专家开始相信这种状况将对当地的经济发展产生不利影响。
5.Moreover, many people, including drivers and cyclists, do not obey the traffic rules properly, especially at busy intersections. And this undoubtedly worsens the already grave situation.
而且,许多人,包括司机和骑自行车的人,不能很好地遵守交通规则,特别是在繁忙的十字路口,这无疑使本已严重的状况雪上加霜。 以上是一些和生活息息相关的例句整理,同学们可以相应的自己寻找更多重要的精品语句,在整个考研英语复习过程中,不断的提升语言的驾驭能力非常重要,这就离不开大量的词汇、语句积累,多读文章固然很重要,但更重要的是记住所读过的各种精品语句,乃至精品文章,反复诵读、不断记忆自然会增加脑海中的知识积累程度,到考研英语写作时自然能够信手拈来,毫不费力的写出精彩的文章,英语作文和中文作文一样,要有突出的亮点来吸引人的眼球,亮点不在多而在精,多加背诵精品语句,对于英语作文分数的提升有很好的帮助。
篇三:修改作文的基本方法有六种
修改作文的基本方法有六种,可以用六个字来概括,即,“增、删、改、调、换、留”。
增,指的是增加必要的内容,使文章的语句或内容更加完整。如:“看了这部书,获得了许多知识。”谁“获得了许多知识?”句子中没有回答。可改为:看了这部书,我获得了许多知识。
删,指的是删去与中心无关的语句或内容。如:“蔚蓝的天空万里无云,蓝得像一块蓝玻璃。”句子中的“蔚蓝”和“蓝得”重复,可删掉后一个词。
改,指的是改正文章中错误的词句或内容。如:“我争先恐后地在课堂上发言。”一个人怎么能“争先恐后”呢?可改为:大家争先恐后地在课堂上发言。
调,指的是调整文章中颠倒的词语或句子。如:“两个新旧社会,真是鲜明的对比啊!”“两个新旧社会”,岂不变成了四个社会了吗?应把词序调整过来,改为:新旧两个社会,真是鲜明的对比啊!
换,指的是换一个合适的词句或说法。如:“亮亮知道自己错了,心情很繁重。”“繁重”不能形容心情,应换成“沉重”。
留,指的是原来被删去的,后来又认为正确的词句或内容再保留下来。如:“我们伟大的祖国屹立在世界东方。”作者删去了“世界”二字,后来认为留下更恰当,所以用“△△”符号,把两字保留下来。
以上举例,只局限在词句上。文章中错误的内容,不管是词句,还是段落,都可以用这些方法纠正。
(2)
第一:着眼全篇,从整体到局部进行修改
一提到作文修改,有的同学可能就认为这简单,不就是看文中有没有错别字,病句嘛。于是一动笔就埋头于词句的修改中,对作文整体的失误却没有察觉,这样做是本末倒置,无益于作文水平的提高。
面对已起草好的作文,我们应先整体浏览,从全局出发,看作文中心是否明确,是否有新意,看所选材料是否紧紧围绕中心,然后再考虑作文整体框架方面的环节:看文章结构是否紧凑,布局详略是否合理,过渡是否自然,然后才考虑句式
的选用,进行词语的锤炼。
只有从全篇入手进行修改,才能统观全局,从大的背景上权衡得失,局部修改才能有依据,才能有效的提高作文水平。
第二:先求“清通”,后求“工巧”
所谓的“清”,就是文字简洁,把可有可无的字词句一律去掉,不用自己不懂的字词,不生造字词。
所谓的“通”,就是文从字顺,先说什么,后说什么,安排得井井有条,行文合理连贯,相互照应。
做到文章的清与通是作文修改的最基本也是最起码的要求,而初学写作的人常爱堆砌辞藻,滥用修辞,过分追求文辞的华美,并以此为荣,夸示于人。其实,文章的美并不在于用了多少修饰语,有多少名言警句,而是要看它词句是否通顺,表现是否合理确切,因此我们在修改作文时应先求“清通”,使作文文从字顺,简洁明了,在此基础上,再对语言进行适当的加工润色。
那么如何做到“清”与“通”呢?我认为可以从以下几点去做:
(1)句子要简单完整。中学生在作文时,尽量不用或少用复杂的长句,尽量用些短句,在修改时要看文中有无病句,要让每个句子都能准确无误的说清楚一个意思。
(2)注意句子的前后搭配,防止主谓、动宾搭配不当,用词时要注意近义词之间的细微差别,选择恰当的字词表达自己的意思。
(3)修饰过分雕琢的地方,仔细分析每一句话,看它表述是否恰当,是否符合平时说话的习惯,对话是否符合人物的各自身份,不要写书生气太浓的语句。
(4)注意标点符号的运用,分清句读。
许多同学平时不太注意标点符号的用法作文时一“逗”到底,甚至一篇文章中没有一个标点,仅用一个圆点表示停顿。这种做法是很不好的,须知标点符号如同人的五官,必须清朗明白,千万不可忽视标点符号的用法。
另外还应注意标点符号运用的格式,特别是每行开头的第一格不能用句号、逗
号、顿号等标点,省略号、破折号等应占两格,这些虽然是些很细微的地方,我们也不可忽视。
第三:修改内容空洞,令人沉闷的地方
中学生的作文常犯内容空洞、言之无物的毛病,文章读起来乏味,让人感到沉闷,应从如下方面加以改正:
(1)要分析所写句子的正误优劣,看所说的事理是否准确,情调、语言色彩是否合适,读起来是否顺畅,尽量时局字表译名系,内容充实。
(2)句子不要太长,段也不要太长。句子一长,别人不能一下子就看懂,势必影响阅读兴趣;段太长则显得行文呆板枯燥,让人觉得压抑,而写短段则使得文章显得生动活泼。
(3)要精心分析所写的句子是否会产生歧义,是否不合逻辑,一定要做到句意明晰。
(4)文章不能以量压人,要做到内容充实,该长则长,该短则短。
第四:注意文体,力求得体,合乎规范
尽管目前考试作文有淡化文体要求的倾向,但这并不意味着我们可以不顾文体特点,任意为文。
文体不同,对文章的要求也不同,一般说来,记叙文要生动形象,能表达作者鲜明的爱憎之情;议论文要论断准确,逻辑严密;说明文要清楚明晰,让人一目了然;应用文要合乎款式,简洁明了。因此在作文修改中,一定要注意这篇作文是何种文体,它是否符合该类文体的写作要求,千万不能写出既不像记叙文,又不像议论文、说明文的“四不象”作文来。
第五:修改时应注意保持文面整洁,不可忽视小处
由于受时间限制,作文特别时限时作文和应试作文,推倒重写的可能性不大,有时连重新抄录的时间都没有,这样,除了写的时候要谨慎外,在修改时也要避免大涂大抹,大的移位。可改可不改的地方,不必(转载于:www.Zw2.cN 爱 作 文 网)去改,非改不可的地方要将原字词句轻轻划掉,在两行间空白处改正,力求保持卷面的整洁,因为卷面给人的是第一印象,字迹潦草,卷面脏乱差,让人见而生厌,哪有心思去仔细阅读?而字体端正、卷面整洁,却能让人赏心悦目,一见倾心。
此外,有些小的地方也应给予高度重视,如不写或少写错别字,不用错标点等,如果在这些小地方出错,会让人很觉倒胃口,难以获得主观印象分。
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