请帮我看看这篇托福写作能得多少分?11月份准备第一次考托福.Doyou agree or disagree with the following statement?It is more important tokeep your old friends it is to make new friends.Use specific reasons andexamples to support

请帮我看看这篇托福写作能得多少分?11月份准备第一次考托福.Doyou agree or disagree with the following statement?It is more important tokeep your old friends it is to make new friends.Use specific reasons andexamples to support
请帮我看看这篇托福写作能得多少分?11月份准备第一次考托福.
Do
you agree or disagree with the following statement?It is more important to
keep your old friends it is to make new friends.Use specific reasons and
examples to support your answer.
It is obvious that to have a lot of friends is very important and
helpful to all people.For most people,it is easier and happier to work with
their friends,and it often follows the increase of efficiency in work; and to
stay with friends on weekends eating out or seeing a movie would always bring
people a lot of fun and relax.So lots of people would like to make more and
more new friends as possible,whereas,I still believe that to keep a good
friendship with an old friend is the most important,as an old friend usually
knows you better and worth trusting.

It is much easier to make a new friend than
to keep a deep friendship,for example,when two people meet in a cinema and
chat happily for a minute or two while in the anteroom before the movie get
started,they would be familiar with each other and it is easy to build a basic
and simple friendship on it.However,to foster a friendship in order to make
it deeper will be more time consuming.Under most situations,much more time
are needed for people to develop a really friendship,and I do not think a
really friendship is just for people to have a happy time together,a really friendship needs people to trust in each other.

原文在这，上面没有贴全，而且格式也不对。

请帮我看看这篇托福写作能得多少分?11月份准备第一次考托福.Doyou agree or disagree with the following statement?It is more important tokeep your old friends it is to make new friends.Use specific reasons andexamples to support
第一,有不少语法错误,我简单看了一下,楼主你要用一些难的词汇,而且像friendship次用了好多遍."a really friendship" 这个完全就讲不通,顶多是real friendship.而且楼楼也可以改成life-long friendship之类的……
第二,这类题目的话最好写的是两个都重要,就说虽然交新朋友很重要,但是旧朋友也不能忽略.
我是托福过来人,写作这次考是满分,我觉得楼楼你能差不多拿20分不到一点左右.加油,有事可以私聊